Today I would like to take time to give God thanks and praise. Show some gratitude to God for who He is. God is sovereign and just. His love, grace, and mercy are not contingent on who we are but on who He is. He is God of all grace.
The other day, I felt the Holy Spirit upon me. He was teaching me about some Bible verses and I was gaining new understanding of them. But it was in the middle of the night as I lay-ed there awake. I was feeling tired and annoyed with myself that I couldn’t fall back to sleep. Yawning and exhausted, wondering why, if I was so tired that I didn’t just drift off into peaceful slumber? But in the meantime, I was learning from the Spirit and gaining new perspective.
In my own frustration, being conceded, I took God’s name in vain. I immediately knew it was wrong and I began to repent. I began to cry out but the Spirit had left. He was offended. I didn’t realize where it had come from at first. Was it a thought I had? I didn’t come outward and say it but the damage was done.
This past week, since Easter, has been a real eye opener for me. A game changer, as I begin to get to know the Lord in a whole new way. You could say, “I’ve been seeing the Kingdom of God.” What I mean is, the Lord has broken my mirror of self-reflection. How I view myself and the world as it is. I can see myself as I am, the good and the bad. He has been getting down to my core! My beliefs, values, morals and my way of seeing things. God has been teaching me His ways, aligning me up with His heart. More of how He sees. It’s been a process to say the least. I’m beginning to see life through new lenses. I’m getting to know Him in a more intimate way.
In the beginning of the week, I didn’t even understand what grace is. I had only a concept of it. I was in a place of hurting and could only see my pain. When we view things through our eyes, eyes of pain, it is all we can see. It leaves us wondering how good God really is, it leaves us questioning Him, doubting Him. Grace is undeserving love and mercy that He gives us. We did nothing to receive it. We all fall short of it but God gives it anyway because of Who He is. His unconditional love for us. I will go further into this in another article called, “God of all Grace.” But for now that is sufficient.
For the first time, I could see His true love. I was born again with the Spirit. I was basking in His goodness. New hope filled me as I began to cling to His grace and His promises. I felt His love and was starting to see life as it is. I wasn’t confined to my mirror and image. A self-awareness began about who I am. Seeing myself as being saved and redeemed.
Back to that night, I guess I was feeling a bit on top of the world. I was becoming cocky and impatient. I didn’t say the Lord’s name in vain out loud, no, but I said it from my heart! I think that is worst. My heart had some ugliness in it that I didn’t know was there. It needed to be removed. I wasn’t directly feeling that I was better than anyone but I had to be knocked down. Taken off my high horse. Made to realize I am human. The wind was knocked out of my sails. I became aware that I am nothing without God. He is the only one who makes me righteous. It’s not of my own doing. I fall short like everyone else.
Fear took over me. I became afraid that I had lost God’s favor. Did I lose the Holy Spirit? I was only beginning to see what life is about. Seeing His grace, could I lose it? I felt a bit confused. I read scripture. I kept turning to God and praying. I finally realized what I had done and begged for His forgiveness, mercy, and grace. I asked Him to bestow His Spirit upon me again. God was faithful. In His timing, I realized what humility is. Which I posted on my sight, “Point of Humility.” I felt humble. It gave me realization of how much I need God. I’m in need of His mercy and grace each day. I realized I’m not special in any way. I’m not above anyone in any way, shape, or form. I’m just like everyone else. I need Jesus. My sins are forgiven through His Son Jesus. This humility knocked me back down to Earth, making me feel like a mere human again. I did nothing to deserve what God gives me. He gives me everything out of who He is.
God disciplined me as His child. He reprimanded me. My heart felt troubled and I was heavy burdened. I had to reflect on what I did and realize it was my heart. God hadn’t changed but I needed to. He circumcised my heart to align with His. He brought me back into focus with who He is. Humbling me to submit to Him. That He is all powerful. Any power given to me is by His Spirit and not of my own accord. His ways are higher and not contingent on who I am. It’s all about Him, folks. How much we need Him. In that moment, I began giving Him thanks and praise that He is just. He was quiet but He didn’t abandon me. He was disciplining me and wanted me to know that I did wrong. It was uncomfortable and my heart was troubled by what I did. Once I learned my lesson, repented, He was willing to forgive. Faith is only a word if no action.
God wants our hearts. He wants us to come as we are. Knowing we are sinners and that we all fall short of His glory. We are in need of His grace, love, and mercy. Without Him, we are mere human beings and we see from man’s point of view. We don’t see from His point of view, His ways. We have to be shown and taught, and yes even disciplined. We have to be willing to let the Spirit guide us. Willing to listen and open up our hearts. Willing to let Him transform our hearts, mind, and souls. Realizing He holds the whole world in His hands. He is the one in control. He has all the power and authority over the Universe. I have gained new fear of the Lord, in the fact of the matter, that it is He who holds my soul. He holds my eternity and I need to be concerned about what is in my heart. It’s important. God sees what is on the inside. He sees what we cannot see. He is the judge. He is who He is, the great I Am. The beginning and the end.
Today, I encourage you to give God thanks and praise for who He is. He is worthy. Thank Him for the blessings He bestows upon you. To not complain for this one time but instead to thank Him for everything He gives you. Everything we have is from Him and out of His goodness, His mercy. Every good gift is from Him, including our breath we breathe. We don’t deserve it but He gives it freely. We need to give it as freely as we receive it. God bless you in your journey!